THE ONLY REALITY IS NOW…
What made you stop for a moment and read this blog? Strangely drawn to the title? Secretly craving more ‘now’ moments?
In my book, ‘Wake Up - What Are Your Emotions Really Telling You?’ I talk a lot about living in the now, in the present moment. This fashionable quip rolls off the tongue and the concept, no doubt, floats through many a peace seeking mind every so often. I know it does mine. But then I find myself asking; how much do I really practice being in the now moment? Being totally absorbed in the sensation of a tasty meal, totally present in a conversation with a friend, of occasionally noticing what part of my body is in contact with the ground….
Whilst flicking through the catalogue of pictures to include in this blog, the one above really stood out for me. No stunning landscapes to stimulate every sense, no action shot of someone frozen in mid leap - just a woman at peace. Shutting off her overused visual sense so that her others may become more attuned. More ‘in-tune’. More harmonious. The smell of the fauna; the touch of the leaf; the submergence into nature. Do you feel tempted to join her in that timeless, singular moment? Can you imagine yourself in that same state…. just for a moment?
Most of the time we have an idea of where we want our lives to go. Of what we want to be doing in a week’s, a month’s, even a year’s time. But 2020 has put pain to our normal ego-obsessed planner. The implications of the coronavirus has served to put a rigid, prescriptive future into some doubt. Yet, there is always light at the end of every tunnel. It’s just that, with this particular tunnel, we don’t know quite how long it is going to be and what outdated parts of ourselves the new light wants to burn away….
Without the usual recourse of projecting our lives into some imagined future moment, our chattery minds are left with fewer options. Yes, we can still ruminate about the ‘known’ past of course. Or perhaps we can become more aware of the present. I’ve been aware that, during lockdown, I’ve been doing a fair bit of the former. But that hasn’t really brought me much peace. The tiring, repetitive themes which endlessly cycle around, and yet don’t seem to reach any satisfactory conclusion. So I’ve decided to be kinder to myself and to practise the latter. To try to become more aware. More mindful. More present.
In the chapter on Anxiety in my book I talk about how, in an anxious state, we live in our heads. We leave the sanctity of our body and create mental worlds which don’t actually exist. Yet we convince ourselves that they are more real than the one right beneath us. The world right under our feet. The one which has always, and will always, continue to physically support us when we take time to fully sense ourselves upon its surface.
Coming back into our bodies helps us to get in touch with the now. With reality. Practising living in every corner of our physical body, fully feeling the sensations produced by it, helps to still the mind.
How much time do you spend actually living in your body? Being aware of the coolness of the breath as it enters your nostrils. The beating of your heart when you sit in silence. The sound and sensation when you take an occasional moment to rub your fingertips with your thumb.
Mindfulness has become the new self awareness buzz word of our times. Even taking over from the more traditional term of meditation. But, in many respects, they are one and the same thing. To be mindful means to give awareness to how your mind normally works. Of where it goes on ‘auto-pilot’, when we stop paying attention.
Most people believe that to meditate ‘successfully’ we have to stop thinking entirely. Easy right? Well, by bringing more awareness to the concept that we are the thinker of our thoughts, and not the thoughts themselves, we can begin to ‘stop thinking’ in the way that we have always done. There is a quote from the chapter on Personal Power in my book which frequently comes to my mind. Especially when I want to soothe its incessancy:
“While meditating we are simply seeing what the mind has been doing all along."
Amit Ray (Indian author and spiritual teacher)
When we are more able to successfully ‘watch’ our thoughts we can begin to disassociate ourselves from them. And to realise that we are not them. Our examined mind, our ego, can be likened to an unbridled horse running crazily around us in circles on a field. We attempt to keep up with it, exhausting ourselves in a never ending, pointless chase. A horse can always outrun a human. Perhaps we need to change tac…
First, understand why the horse is running. It’s trying to get somewhere - but it only ends up back where it started. By standing still, while it runs around us, we demonstrate that it is a lot less exhausting to just remain with our feet planted firmly in one spot on the grass. And to observe.
Eventually, whatever the horse is doing, wherever it is trying to get too, it becomes intrigued by the still, grounded standpoint we have taken. That of observer. The watcher and the ‘wait-er’ of it. We can offer an outstretched hand until the horse is curious enough to approach us. To allow us to brush its forehead. To calm its impetuousness.
On gaining its trust, we can reconnect with it in such a way that it transforms into an avatar. An embodiment of our spiritual potential rather than of our hyena-like ego. This equine avatar allows us to, once again, live fully in our body. Mentally, emotionally and spiritually. To feel our very aliveness in such a way that we cannot readily escape to the lofty attic of our heads. The attic which, all along, has craved the sanctuary of the light filled, more comfortable rooms just below…
“Nothing ever happened in the past: it happened in the now. Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the now.”
Eckhart Tolle
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